I had a bowl right next to my plate and took the lid off to peer inside, wondering what exotic food might be in store. Inside I saw nothing. Absolutely nothing. This intrigued me because I knew a liquid was essential to cooking "hot pot".

I also had high expectations because every person with whom I had discussed Chinese food had asked if I had tried "hot pot". When I shook my head, it usually prompted a waving of hands, sighs, a rolling of eyes and sometimes a rubbing of stomachs, as the speakers described the delights of this mysterious dish.

In any case, the moment to sample "hot pot" had arrived. Menus with beautiful pictures provided information to explain the Chinese characters displayed on the page. Moment of enlightenment! The entire meal, broth and all, would arrive together. We made our choices excitedly.

When it arrived, the "hot pot" turned out to be a slightly spicy liquid in a giant bowl surrounded by various raw wonders. In the center of our table was a lazy susan where all the food was placed. The lamb and beef were rolled on a tray with meticulous care, while a garden of mushrooms standing upright in tofu was much admired and provoked many photographs. A tray piled high with miscellaneous greens, a bowl of noodles, a plate with sheets of dried tofu and another with shrimp were also squeezed into the last remaining spaces.

After the water came to a boil, we began "the dance".

At least, it seemed a sort of dance, as we spun the food back and forth, waiting when others were reaching for certain items, and learning to observe where others might be in their eating cycle so that you could turn the turntable to their advantage.

It occurred to me that the dance was teaching us how to be more considerate of each other. In being more aware of my friends' immediate food needs, I waited to spin a different food closer to me. With every spin of the lazy susan, my meal experience was more closely linked to that of my friends.

The moments of our meal were more richly experienced because, in the awareness of my friends' choices and methods of eating, I somehow learned more about them. They somehow became more familiar, their way of being more "known". I also wondered if this sharing somehow gave them equal insight into my way of being?

And I also wondered if I had just stumbled upon one of the most worthwhile lessons to be learned in China: In learning to create this meal together, we learned a bit more about what it means to share life.